The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz was recommended to me.
The four agreements are basically rules to live by. They’re quite simple, but all encompassing. I can see how following them will lead to peace and contentment.
Spoiler Alert–These are the four agreements:
- Be impeccable with your word: use your words to create beauty, love and heaven on earth.
- Don’t take anything personally (this is a hard one for me.)
- Don’t make assumptions (another hard one for me.)
- Always do your best.
There’s more to the book, but this is the meat and potatoes.
I’m trying to let go of my old ways to embrace these four agreements. I hope, in time, the agreements become second nature and I don’t have to consciously decide to follow them. In the meantime, just being aware that I’m taking something personally or making an assumption has been helpful.
The Chihuahua verdict: four paws up!
I’m not going to lie. I’ve been a bit down lately.
It’s hard to meet people in this new town. The cottage has lost its appeal. The new job is both busier and newer than I expected. (Don’t get me started on the technology challenges!)
And the divorce…
It’s like a threatening shadow looming over me, hiding the sun. It’s making me wilt, and I worry that I’ll never bloom again.
What’s a sad and lonely bookworm to do when things get to be too much? Scour the self-help shelf of the nearest book shop, of course.
I ordered a Brene Brown book.
The lady at Talewind Books recommended Why Not? by Cathy Code while I wait for it to arrive.
Why Not? is an easy read. I finished it in one afternoon.
Cathy Code, who went through her own divorce (along with a catastrophic fire, traumatic childhood experiences, sudden death of a beloved partner…) is relentlessly optimistic. She shares her personal experiences and includes “think positive/it could be worse” exercises at the end of every chapter.
I like the message. I just don’t know if it’s really me.
I’m not as optimistic as Cathy Code, so a gentler approach would probably resonate more with me. (Think: “Your life might not be a total disaster” rather than “Everything’s going to be wonderful and you will survive and thrive!!!”)
When I reached the part about Code’s fabulous post-divorce social life and the two amazing men with whom she had deep and satisfying relationships, I felt like a loser–not the outcome I was hoping for when I went the self-help route.
Sigh–back to the drawing board.