What lives in a tree and sh!ts fist-sized blobs of thick green slime?

Curious?  Me, too.

Disgusted, horrified and grossed out?  Maybe you’re not, but I certainly was when this gooey clump landed on my head with a nauseating splat.

Errands put aside for another less harrowing day, I sprinted home and leapt into the shower.  (Probably the most athletic interlude I’ve had in months.)

There was so much of it, blackish green splatter marks covered the shower walls after I’d washed (and washed and washed) my hair.  (Picture an en suite at the Bates Motel after Norman’s gone three rounds with a hapless Martian.)

Friends, what can I say, I had to look.

The splatter marks were shockingly green bits of…something.

I hit the interwebs to research slimy green scat, and came up with…nothing.

Until I hear otherwise my best guess is that some left-over Halloween ghoul or goblin shat on my head.

I just hope monster poo is safe for colour-treated hair.